Birthday anti-clubbing

The Birthday Girl herself

Before Christmas my little sister Rachel - commonly known as Roy - turned 18. She hates clubbing so wasn't about to spend her first night as a legal drinker crawling around the sticky dancefloor of Embargo or -god forbid- the brand new Bodo's Schloss which just opened down the road. Not for her a bobsleigh and jumping up and down to Gangham style. Though I admit to me it sounds fairly appealing.

We decided the best thing to celebrate therefore would be to rip all the furniture out of the house, pile it up downstairs and replace it with long trestle tables to seat 25 of her closest friends. She roped me in to do the cooking.

Cooking for 25 people is no joke. It is mass catering. In our boxy kitchen it becomes a logistical nightmare. The solution? Don't involve the stove. Once the stove is involved its all over. You've lost. Give up.

Involve the nice oven and dependable countertops instead - because if you leave them be for a while they wont have an actual hissy fit.

Krells young and old (left-right) surrounded by BOYS BOYS BOYS.

I actually thought the end result was quite elegant, both practically and gastronomically. Though I say so myself.

Slow Roast Pork Shoulder with crackling

You need 2 large pork shoulders for 25 people, I reckon. It doesn't sound like very much, but when there are a lot of people they seem to eat less. We had plentiful leftovers, which I'll get to in another post.

I would also say that, if you can, try and buy some extra pork rind for more crackling. Everyone loves crackling, and your butcher should you have one should be happy to give it to you for next to nothing. Failing that, try Morrisons, strangely enough.

To make good crackling you need salt - sea salt. Either fine or maldon, it doesnt matter. Rub it well into the scored rind and leave it uncovered for as long as you can - an hour is great, 15 minutes is fine. Come back and wipe away the water that has come to the surface of the rind using kitchen towel.

 Now re-salt (not too much) and spice-rub your rind and pork. I always use the same flavours with pork - spicy aniseedy flavours, they just work with the rich meat so well.

A tablespoon of each per shoulder -
Caraway Seeds
Cumin Seeds
Red chilli flakes
Fennel seeds
Pepper

Star Anise (2 per shoulder)
Garlic cloves, bruised if you can be bothered (just throw half a dozen or so in the roasting tray)

I also like to slice up lots of onions and put them under the meat, so that later you have an sauce. And I throw in a lemon and its zest if there's one lying around.

You really don't need any oil.

Put this all in a really hot oven (220-230C) and leave for about 30-40 minutes until the rind has started to blister and crackle. then turn the oven right down to 170C and leave it for ever. 5 hours I did, it could've stayed longer. Baste it occasionally if you want. You really don't need to.

If by the time the five hours is up you feel your crackling could be cracklier, give it another blast at 230. Sometimes I use the grill to do this final blast.

You don't even need to carve this, it should be so meltingly tender that you should only need two forks to pull it apart, and, if you've done your job well, a sledge hammer to break up the crackling. If not a big knife or rolling pin will do.

Then strain off the fat in the pan (there will be alot) and put the oniony juices into big gravy boats, to be spooned over the meat at will.

Table detritus

Now all you need are some salads to go with it - enter the countertop.

Two Attractive Salads

Involve lentils - they are just so nice with pork, ask any Italian. Buy them ready cooked and vacuum packed. (Remember - do not involve the stove). Merchant Gourmet and Waitrose do them, nice puy lentils. Then I added some jarred roasted peppers, drained and chopped up, and some sundried tomatoes, and plenty of herbs - parsley, chives and coriander. If you have the time and patience, chargrill some chopped raddiccio and add it in for some bitterness. Throw in any nuts you have hanging around -- use this opportunity to get rid of all the half empty packets of nuts you have in the cupboard. Then dress it in all lemon or balsamic and a little olive oil. You want a fairly sharp dressing to cut through the richness of the accompanying meat.

One more salad I think -- an aesthetically pleasing one. I did one with Chicory, baby spinach and pomegranate seeds, and some very thinly sliced orange. I dressed it in a mixture of lemon juice, orange juice and walnut oil - I always think olive oil tastes a little funny with fruit.



There you have it - an attractive supper that won't leave you feeling bloated or lethargic. Perhaps thats why the party lasted until five in the morning. Bodo's Schloss eat your heart out.

I wish we had more pictures of the food but we're novices at this. In some pictures you can just about see the salads. But the cake is wholly more exciting and pleasing to look at. It was a rainbow oreo cake, in case you're wondering.

This insane cake was baked by the ridiculously talented Scarlett Curtis. I am no baker myself, and the whole thing puzzles and amazes me in equal measure. 

HOW?!?!

RAINBOWz





Love the Krells x